[Loki is translating those statements and trying to read beyond them. The cottage looks as it ever does down in the main areas. It's up in Loki's room, that some things might be obviously different. Not that Owen is going to see that room.
Ultimately, Loki is not sure what to trust as his reading of the situation. Of 'Owen' being here instead of Puck, and of the business formality that was practiced and part of that role. It could be as simple as Puck using this form as a way to start to distance himself from Loki. At least he wasn't intending to hurt Loki? Although it would hurt anyways.
Or it could be that Puck was trying to communicate with more than words and more than he as himself would usually say. Layers, and usually Loki was perceptive enough to see all of them. Especially since while 'Owen' had been scarce, 'Puck' had not. The dual identity just lending itself to more layers and complexity.
Loki didn't trust himself to read them all correctly right then. He was already fighting old habits. He was hurt, afraid--now that others knew, surely they'd turn on him. Right? Never really trusted, nor accepted for who he was. Only when he was useful, or could keep things hidden and play the smiling and charming trickster people enjoyed the company of.
But he was tired of being hurt, and looking for the ways others would do so. He wanted to believe things might be different here. It was why he was fighting his old habits to lash out and withdraw. Well, no, he was withdrawn--but he wasn't lashing out before he could be hurt more. Progress?]
I quite understand. This time of year is usually busy for small villages like this.
no subject
Ultimately, Loki is not sure what to trust as his reading of the situation. Of 'Owen' being here instead of Puck, and of the business formality that was practiced and part of that role. It could be as simple as Puck using this form as a way to start to distance himself from Loki. At least he wasn't intending to hurt Loki? Although it would hurt anyways.
Or it could be that Puck was trying to communicate with more than words and more than he as himself would usually say. Layers, and usually Loki was perceptive enough to see all of them. Especially since while 'Owen' had been scarce, 'Puck' had not. The dual identity just lending itself to more layers and complexity.
Loki didn't trust himself to read them all correctly right then. He was already fighting old habits. He was hurt, afraid--now that others knew, surely they'd turn on him. Right? Never really trusted, nor accepted for who he was. Only when he was useful, or could keep things hidden and play the smiling and charming trickster people enjoyed the company of.
But he was tired of being hurt, and looking for the ways others would do so. He wanted to believe things might be different here. It was why he was fighting his old habits to lash out and withdraw. Well, no, he was withdrawn--but he wasn't lashing out before he could be hurt more. Progress?]
I quite understand. This time of year is usually busy for small villages like this.