whose_son_am_i | Meme-shenanigans and Continuations.

That he'd asked at all was part of a sign of how he cared for her. Otherwise he'd have just gone ahead and done it. Letting the fireworks go in favor of wrapping his arms around her once more instead, he hmm'd against her brow. "What is your schedule like this week? I have to meet with Strange, and if things go...well enough, I may be meeting either with SHIELD or Tony Stark. Or both. Meeting as me, no less." Not as Eric.

Edited 2021-08-28 21:16 (UTC)

"I took off most of the week" she tucks the flower into his hair.

"I'm working Wednesday and Thursday. I've heard Stark has the same ego as you."

"I've met the man. He is quite full of himself. I doubt he'll be pleased to see me. I'm not entirely looking forward to it either, but it may be necessary." A pause. "Whether I like it or not, there is...a potential for trouble coming that threatens all of us. That is why I plan to talk to Strange."

"What sort of threat?" She is concerned, and it is felt through the link as well.

"The being who gave me access to the scepter and the chitauri, when I invaded." Treating this seriously. "I...I'm going to share some very private things with you, Christine." It was definitely serious when he used her name. "Things I haven't shared with others--and logically, I probably shouldn't with you." But he wanted to, even though it made no sense.

"It started 6 or so years ago. Thor was to have his coronation day, as Father was getting older. We're not immortal, but our lifespans are so different as to make us functionally so. I played a prank, to disrupt Thor's day, by letting 3 frost giants into the realm unseen. I did not know I was adopted at the time. I found out, later, when Thor defied our Father's order and took me, Lady Sif, and the warriors Three to Jotunheim to demand answers. A jotunn's touch in their native environment was able to burn the flesh with cold. It happened to Fandrel, and almost happened to me. Except...I wasn't burned. My skins started to turn the same shade as their own."

"Whatever you tell me will be in confidence." Because it's important and because he is important.

She is carefully focused on his story.

"That's how you found out." She feels for him, a bit of sadness at how he found out he was adopted.

"It sparked my curiosity. We would've died that day, had Odin not rescued us. I had let a guard know Thor's intention, before we left for the bifrost. What I didn't know was just how angry Father would be--that we were on the cusp of starting a war. He banished Thor, after stripping him of his powers and Mjolnir. Sent him and the hammer to Midgard." Pausing, setting his thoughts in order. "There is an artifact, that Father had taken from the Jotunn, called the Winter Casket. When they'd tried to invade a thousand years ago, they used it to try and turn Midgard into a realm of ice and snow more to their tastes. I went to Father's vaults, and held it...and it revealed the truth to me. Father came to talk, and I confronted him."

Now he's hiding his head against her hair, unused to letting himself be so vulnerable and bare. "I was....angry. Confused. I'd apparently been left to die; the King, Laufey, not caring for a runt. Odin took me---I was convinced it had to be for a purpose and he would tell me. Why wouldn't he just tell me."

Christine wraps him a bit tighter in her embrace.

Her mind reaches to hold him just the same as her body is. As with most humans she had only heard gossip about what had happened before the invasion.

He latches onto her as if she's a lifeline, with mind and arms. As she'd noted before, he was both so much older than her, but also so much younger too. "He didn't answer, because he fell into the Odinsleep. Mother and I weren't sure he would awaken from it, and I was given the throne as Thor was banished." Taking a breath. "I'd only wanted to spoil Thor's big day. I worried he was too full of himself, too impetuous and too much a warrior than a King. Now we were on the cusp of war."

Another long pause. "...I hatched plans, to finally prove I was worthy, in Father's eyes. I needed Thor to stay on Earth, however. His friends went after him, and I sent the Destroyer after them. I invited Laufey to come kill Odin, then killed him in turn. It would've been perfect if Thor had only stayed away..."

Sometimes he really is young. She can feel his hurt and confusion.

While his plans had been far grander than most, in the end, he had still been a son wanting approval from his father.

"But he didn't stay away."

"He did not, and that wasn't the worst of it, I suppose." He sighed, still hiding against her. "I tried to wipe out Jotunheim. Vanquish our ancient enemies once and for all, using the bifrost on overload mode, as it were. Thor stopped me, by destroying the bifrost. We both would've fallen, except Father had woken. He grabbed Thor, and Thor was holding Gungnir, the spear. Which I held on to. It...I...disappointed my Father that day, and I let go. To fall among the stars."

He should actually be able to feel the way her heart aches for him, he is so important to her and he's suffered more than he should.

She presses a kiss to his forehead.

He can feel her emotions; she's projecting again without realizing and it confuses him. But Loki also takes...comfort? Courage? He's not sure. But it soothes his nerves about sharing. Holding on to her tightly, in all the ways he could--as if she'd vanish. Surely she'd reject him, even though she promised to be his until he tired of her.

"I've been through the dregs of the universe, with only my wits and skills to survive. I neither saw nor received either kindness or comfort. Eventually, I found my way to a being known as the Mad Titan. Or his ambassador, rather--known as The Other. They promised me an army, that it was only waiting for a commander. Gave me the scepter, and I targeted Earth. To prove myself useful. I would rule over it as a benevolent God, while the Mad Titan turned his plans to subjugating the universe."

Then, so very very quietly and softly. "I got in over my head."

Edited 2021-08-28 22:24 (UTC)

"Even I would have taken any opportunity to not be out in the worst bits of the galaxy."

She gently nuzzles him. She projects on purpose this time, a calm acceptance and more importantly a level of understanding.

"I would deliver him the Tesseract. I learned mind control from him. It was...assured I would suffer, if I failed." He had failed, and been brought back to Asgard in chains. Silent for several moments, still trying to puzzle out what she was giving to him.

"He'll come for the Tesseract, if nothing else. But I believe he's searching for more than just that. Which is why I am meeting with the Sorcerer. And if necessary, Stark. It's also why I have been searching for a place to hide it, since I'm not sure it can be destroyed. That's what I've been doing since we came to Midgard."

It was important she know. Loki wasn't sure why, but it was. It mattered.

He was still baffled though. "...you should be angry at me." Why wasn't she angry? Rejecting him?

Everything he had done makes more sense. It doesn't make it good, or okay, but she can see some of the reasons why he would choose the path he had taken.

"Why should I be angry? This is just the background for what I already know."

"Then you're more of a fool than I thought." It was his turn to unconsciously project emotions. Tangles of fear and hurt, worry and anxiety and underneath it all a desperate loneliness still. His tone was not kind. "Everything I did, was to serve my own ends and myself. I cared nothing for this planet--I still believe that you all would be better off ruled--you're simply too stubborn to admit it. You're all children." Hissed out, pulling back and moving to hold her at arm's length. Anger born from fear and anxiety. "You're all heading into a larger universe than you could've dreamed of, and it's my fault. Hel--I may yet bring worse down on you."

The quick turn is a surprise and she is momentarily taken aback by it.

Her immediate response is to reply to those emotions with calm, it's the first time she's using her Empathy to try to change someones emotions though she doesn't actually mean to. She just wants to help.

"You don't mean all of that." She is handling this really well.

"I do." He's lying--a lie so good he almost believes it himself. The tangle of his emotions and strength of that anger born of fear and pain fighting with the calm she's projecting.

The link is so strong right now that there's a slip of emotion that she doesn't realize is trickling though: love.

"Okay. Then I am a fool and a child." It's said in a way that completely accepts his assessment.

That throws him entirely for a loop, and he looks like he's been hit. "Stop it." Hissed out again. How....

"How?"

Because she is neither a child nor a fool--and the fact that she'd agreed with him hurts. And he doesn't know fully why--or why it's so important. How can she still care about him?

"How what?"

She isn't trying to touch him, she's giving him some space and trying to keep her emotions from flowing too freely.

"...How can you..."

Care/not-be-angry/understand/accept? I'mamonsterandworthlessandnevergoodenough. Even his mental voice is a jumble and Loki isn't realizing that he's speaking to her that way.

She finally offers a hand to him.

"Can I hug you?"

There is is again, along with her calm, her acceptance, there's love.

"Why?" It's pleading. He's so confused; everything is too much and just...what does he do?

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