"...I wish I'd had a friend like you growing up Eilonwy. It might've saved me from some mistakes." Honestly he wished he'd had a friend of his own, period. But especially one like Eilonwy. A nod of thanks to her as well.
"I'm quite certain Vaeros would be both subtler and use more direct magic. I admit, with time I've come to wonder also if it is not that he was using multiple spells at the feast and ball not because he is weak, but perhaps as a fail-safe and/or to make us more pliable by using many routes to get to us. Should one method fail, there had been another. If multiple angles of enchantment also happened to make us weaker to overall to the attempt, that would also serve his purpose."
Bringing a snack up himself, Loki looked at it for a moment. "Damn that I didn't have my magic then." The bite of snack might be a bit vicious, given the statement.
Eilonwy smiled at the sentiment and then had some more tea as she listened as Loki explained things.
"It's a smart strategy, if not a bit heavy handed. You have to make very educated guesses at how your attacks can work and assume a lot about your targets, especially if--" She paused mid sentence, eyes narrowing as Eilonwy realized something.
"Especially if that was your first time fighting them. If the masquerade was nothing more than a glorified training session, then.. Then Vaeros could have more planned, with better strategies for the future." Eilonwy sighed.
"No, you shouldn't blame yourself like that. You did help after everything. We all did what we could, and there's no shame in that." But it was still a bit scary to think about. Eilonwy resolved to learn as much as she could in the meantime.
"Heavy handed does not surprise me, given all we know about him." Loki murmured, letting this all turn over in his mind. "It is not unlikely, that of it being a training session and trial run so to speak. But it's also not certain. And we shouldn't assume it is the obvious when there are other possibilities too. We do not know that Vaeros views us as adversaries to be fought and conquered."
Oh, that raised an interesting point. "It brings to mind something one of my co-conspirator's mentioned too. And something I've pondered." Especially since if Loki was right, he saw a parallel between himself and Vaeros and didn't like it.
"He wants us to love him. He could easily make us be his subjects, considering how easily he brings us here and strips our abilities. It would be an artificial love, an imposed one--not 'real' as it were." And if you spend long enough in that kind of illusion, you lose sight of what's real eventually. "But if he has been deeply hurt and wounded before... If he's trying to not be hurt like that again, but also wants to be loved for who he is...this all starts to make sense. He's trying to beguile and woo us, but also not above trying to alter and use illusion to make that all come to be real entirely."
It made sense to Loki, and he wasn't sure he was explaining it well, but it all made SENSE.
Eilonwy absorbed everything and nodded at the mention of not assuming Vaeros saw them as enemies. At the mention of love, she looked off to the side in thought.
"Wooing by showing off magic, and instead of showing one's entire heart, especially if you've been hurt before, you keep it hidden. You hurt others by writing cruel things about them or by removing their abilities.." Eilonwy trailed off as she looked back to Loki.
"It's.. That idea isn't uncommon, but I've never heard of a ruler working that way. You don't gain the trust of your subjects by being mercurial." It clicked, and Eilonwy rubbed between her eyes with a sigh.
"But you would do that if you were a fairy. Because that's how they operate. All we can do is prepare, then." It did make sense, but from Eilonwy's tactical viewpoint, it was just badly planned. Loki's mention of it being 'real', stuck out.
"...The townspeople. Their love for him isn't real. What if everyone here is part of the second test?"
"We're still assuming Vaeros is a fae, and not all rulers who are volatile or mercurial must also be fae." Loki pointed out, not mentioning that he himself was often known for volatile emotions. Actually, aside from grandiose egoism while pretending to be Odin, he'd been a not too terrible ruler by some metrics.
"It may not be, or it could be by this point if it's been in place long enough. We also don't know how recent Vaeros' reign started. If it was a generation ago, then it could be starting to become natural and real, by the townsfolk, as it'd be all some of them have known."
"That's true.." Eilonwy agreed with a sigh. It was hard to let go of the idea that Vaeros was at least some kind of fae, but Eilonwy also understood that by not doing that she was limiting herself. Like ignoring a map in favor of your own sense of direction, but never actually moving.
She had some more of her tea and considered that last statement. "Another good point.. If I were somewhere for a generation and suddenly had others questioning what I knew as reality, I can't say I'd be happy about it." But the entire thing still didn't sit right with her. Eilonwy put her cup down and studied it for a moment in thought.
"I'll sort my thoughts about that later. For now, other things."
"It is always good to discuss this with you. You're one of the few who even knows my actual notebook exists." Loki said with a faint smile. "Thank you, for your support. I am...pleasantly surprised, and no little honored, that people are continuing to be my friend. To trust me."
A bit sad and wistful there, but it was true all the same.
"The accusations and deeds in the profile were true, but without full context. I have tried to kill Thor, my adopted brother, repeatedly. I have also invaded Midgard with intent to conquer, when I was young and angry and hurt. I was also manipulated, though I still made the choices to do so. I did indeed spend a year in prison which did little to reform me in some ways. In others...it changed things completely."
Eilonwy smiled back. "You're welcome, but you don't need to thank me." Another snack was considered but Eilonwy held off for the time being.
"Most rumors are like that, I've found. Insults can sometimes be very sharp words meant to strike where people are the most vulnerable." she thought back to the fight with Taran and how quickly it'd escalated. Eilonwy offered one of her hands towards Loki and spoke with a soft authoritative tone.
"I'm a princess, not a member of the court. I won't judge you on the past, because I wasn't there for it and didn't know you then. That would be insensitive to the you I do know. People change, and you've given me no reason to think you anything but what you've shown me." her tone shifted to sounding more like herself than a princess using her own understanding, "Even if those statements are true, that's not all that you are. You're showing that right now."
"The last decade, or just under really, have been very...chaotic for me in many ways. It was change or die, in some ways. Adapt or die really, though I've been trying to adapt in good ways." Loki said with a soft laugh. "I have been trying to learn to do things differently. Even when I might do something the way I've done it before, the motivation is often different now. I am still me. I will never not be a curious being who likes to look into things others won't, to ferret out secrets, and occasionally cause trouble or poke at things others won't. But that doesn't mean I have to be the villain either."
"Curious people are often called scholars in Prydain." Eilonwy remarked. "They're also well read." With a bit of a call back to the way she'd described him before, Eilonwy hoped to keep showing her emotional support of Loki. Upheaval could be hard for anyone and she couldn't picture what it would be like for any god; but she could imagine it was many times worse.
"You can do all of that and not be a villain. If secrets were never explored or trouble caused, how would one grow except by getting taller?"
"See, most people don't like it when others cause trouble. Even if it's useful. Mischief isn't often appreciated." Loki countered, but he caught the support. It was very much appreciated. "I've...seen for myself too, how it can spiral out of control in ways one never intends. So I understand somewhat why it's not always appreciated."
"There's a time and place for it, I agree. But it's still useful, even in smaller doses." Eilonwy thought back to the end of the adventure in Prydain; the wood troll showing he was alive by digging in Taran's vest pockets for apples and suddenly had a much clearer understanding. No one had been mad at Gurgi for the joke, but it hadn't been the best response to things.
"Even if it's not always as funny as it may seem." she added with a little laugh.
"That can be part of it, yes." Loki said cautiously. Time and place for it, and whether it was funny or not, often seemed to be in the eye of the beholder.
"If you have questions, I shall try and answer them. Give you context, as it were, to what was in the profile."
Eilonwy spoke with gentle but firm assurance. "I don't spend my time thinking on barbs, except on how to disarm them or how to shield either myself or my friends from them. The context is appreciated, but I don't need it. Or want it."
Her shoulders relaxed a bit as she smiled. "Unless you mean questions not related to that, then I can think of at least two that I'd love to ask."
Loki smiled; it wasn't a large one, or mischievous or anything. Just an upturn of his mouth, but a relaxing into it. Like he was grateful, and tired, but had needed to hear that. Which he did, honestly.
Mission accomplished. Eilonwy returned the smile. "You're welcome. The first question is easy, I think. With your height, do you ever accidentally run into frames coming into a room?" Eilonwy could imagine herself doing it easily and had been curious for a while.
That brought a chuckle, and Loki let himself lean into the amusement. HE could use it, even if he was mostly feeling... More on balance again. Or if not balanced, as he was aware still that there was a lot he had to deal with, then at least more in control of himself.
"Not really,as I pay attention to the details. I pay attention to a lot of things, honestly. It's how I find out things no one wants me to know."
"Of course, it would be odd if you didn't." With that curiosity settled, Eilonwy thought of her next question. "Hm.. Then for my next and last question. Speaking of details do you ever have layers to any mischief you do? Or does it involve doing just one or two things?"
"Define layers" but that wasn't an answer. "It depends on what I'm trying to do. Some can be very simple, like turning a cup of wine into snakes. Others are more layered. I once did two copies of me, in different places, to fake out and trap my brother in a glass prison-bowl."
"More than one step, so you can reach whatever your goal is." But then Loki was explaining and Eilonwy tilted her head slightly. "How can a bowl-- well, no, if it's a very large bowl, then one could be trapped in it." She thought back to the masquerade's invisible barriers and almost stuck her tongue out at the memory.
"At the time, he was trying to stop me. This was during the invasion. I was young, angry, hurt. I had a clear goal and also a sword hanging over my neck as it were. I couldn't let him stop me."
"Oh! Then it wasn't so much of a joke as it was a defense tactic." Eilonwy folded her arms in thought and then unfolded them as quickly. "Have you ever done it for fun?"
"Put him in a glass bowl? Not yet." Loki answered, and was sad that he likely never would have a chance. "I did turn into a snake once, when we were younger. He picked me up, and then I turned back and stabbed him." Y'know, like brothers do.
Eilonwy sighed. "Not all animals are your friends, I learned that early enough before being allowed into the forest." She imagined Loki as a snake trying to hold a knife in his mouth and laughed suddenly.
"Well yes, but you have to remember. Asgardians are some of the sturdiest and strongest beings in the nine-realms. Add to that the devil-may-care attitude that can come with youth..." But he might've been grinning. It was a fond memory.
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whose_son_am_i) wrote2027-08-15 09:41 pm
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"I'm quite certain Vaeros would be both subtler and use more direct magic. I admit, with time I've come to wonder also if it is not that he was using multiple spells at the feast and ball not because he is weak, but perhaps as a fail-safe and/or to make us more pliable by using many routes to get to us. Should one method fail, there had been another. If multiple angles of enchantment also happened to make us weaker to overall to the attempt, that would also serve his purpose."
Bringing a snack up himself, Loki looked at it for a moment. "Damn that I didn't have my magic then." The bite of snack might be a bit vicious, given the statement.
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"It's a smart strategy, if not a bit heavy handed. You have to make very educated guesses at how your attacks can work and assume a lot about your targets, especially if--" She paused mid sentence, eyes narrowing as Eilonwy realized something.
"Especially if that was your first time fighting them. If the masquerade was nothing more than a glorified training session, then.. Then Vaeros could have more planned, with better strategies for the future." Eilonwy sighed.
"No, you shouldn't blame yourself like that. You did help after everything. We all did what we could, and there's no shame in that." But it was still a bit scary to think about. Eilonwy resolved to learn as much as she could in the meantime.
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Oh, that raised an interesting point. "It brings to mind something one of my co-conspirator's mentioned too. And something I've pondered." Especially since if Loki was right, he saw a parallel between himself and Vaeros and didn't like it.
"He wants us to love him. He could easily make us be his subjects, considering how easily he brings us here and strips our abilities. It would be an artificial love, an imposed one--not 'real' as it were." And if you spend long enough in that kind of illusion, you lose sight of what's real eventually. "But if he has been deeply hurt and wounded before... If he's trying to not be hurt like that again, but also wants to be loved for who he is...this all starts to make sense. He's trying to beguile and woo us, but also not above trying to alter and use illusion to make that all come to be real entirely."
It made sense to Loki, and he wasn't sure he was explaining it well, but it all made SENSE.
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"Wooing by showing off magic, and instead of showing one's entire heart, especially if you've been hurt before, you keep it hidden. You hurt others by writing cruel things about them or by removing their abilities.." Eilonwy trailed off as she looked back to Loki.
"It's.. That idea isn't uncommon, but I've never heard of a ruler working that way. You don't gain the trust of your subjects by being mercurial." It clicked, and Eilonwy rubbed between her eyes with a sigh.
"But you would do that if you were a fairy. Because that's how they operate. All we can do is prepare, then." It did make sense, but from Eilonwy's tactical viewpoint, it was just badly planned. Loki's mention of it being 'real', stuck out.
"...The townspeople. Their love for him isn't real. What if everyone here is part of the second test?"
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"It may not be, or it could be by this point if it's been in place long enough. We also don't know how recent Vaeros' reign started. If it was a generation ago, then it could be starting to become natural and real, by the townsfolk, as it'd be all some of them have known."
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She had some more of her tea and considered that last statement. "Another good point.. If I were somewhere for a generation and suddenly had others questioning what I knew as reality, I can't say I'd be happy about it." But the entire thing still didn't sit right with her. Eilonwy put her cup down and studied it for a moment in thought.
"I'll sort my thoughts about that later. For now, other things."
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A bit sad and wistful there, but it was true all the same.
"The accusations and deeds in the profile were true, but without full context. I have tried to kill Thor, my adopted brother, repeatedly. I have also invaded Midgard with intent to conquer, when I was young and angry and hurt. I was also manipulated, though I still made the choices to do so. I did indeed spend a year in prison which did little to reform me in some ways. In others...it changed things completely."
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"Most rumors are like that, I've found. Insults can sometimes be very sharp words meant to strike where people are the most vulnerable." she thought back to the fight with Taran and how quickly it'd escalated. Eilonwy offered one of her hands towards Loki and spoke with a soft authoritative tone.
"I'm a princess, not a member of the court. I won't judge you on the past, because I wasn't there for it and didn't know you then. That would be insensitive to the you I do know. People change, and you've given me no reason to think you anything but what you've shown me." her tone shifted to sounding more like herself than a princess using her own understanding, "Even if those statements are true, that's not all that you are. You're showing that right now."
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"You can do all of that and not be a villain. If secrets were never explored or trouble caused, how would one grow except by getting taller?"
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"Even if it's not always as funny as it may seem." she added with a little laugh.
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"If you have questions, I shall try and answer them. Give you context, as it were, to what was in the profile."
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Her shoulders relaxed a bit as she smiled. "Unless you mean questions not related to that, then I can think of at least two that I'd love to ask."
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"Thank you, and go ahead."
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"Not really,as I pay attention to the details. I pay attention to a lot of things, honestly. It's how I find out things no one wants me to know."
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"Why did you want to trap him?"
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